Pastor Bolaji Idowu has urged couples to work towards building successful marriages while warning that nobody should remain in an abusive relationship that puts their health or life at risk.
The cleric described being trapped in an unhappy marriage as a painful experience, noting that marriage does not automatically guarantee happiness, companionship or emotional fulfilment.
“Some of the loneliest people in the world are married people because single people think once you get married, it’s all over. No, some of the loneliest people in the world are married people,” he said.
While encouraging couples to make their marriages work, Idowu clarified that his message should not be interpreted as an instruction to endure abuse in the name of preserving a marriage.
“I’m gonna challenge you to make your marriage work, but before I challenge you, I want to say something very powerful: I’m careful lest you ever think because I’m challenging you, I’m also asking you to stay in an abusive relationship,” he stated.
The pastor advised people whose marriages threaten their health and safety to leave temporarily and seek solutions to their marital problems from outside the relationship.
“Any marriage that is threatening your health and life, pack your load, leave temporarily, fix the marriage from outside. If it’s fixable, then you come back,” he said.
When asked whether he would advise someone to leave a marriage if their life was in danger, Idowu answered in the affirmative, stressing that protecting one’s life should take priority over remaining in the relationship.
“Yes, I do. The reason is that nobody’s going to die and you say my marriage killed me and I’m going to be excited about it,” he added.
The cleric’s message was that although couples should make efforts to resolve their differences, preserving a marriage should never come at the expense of a partner’s life.
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