There are things you expect to find on a flight: safety demonstrations, the quiet hum of the engines, a baby threatening to cry, maybe even the comforting aroma of reheated snacks. What you don’t expect, what nobody books an 8:45 a.m. flight for, is a live boxing match in the air.
Imagine it.
You’ve planned a trip from Abuja to Asaba for your cousin’s wedding… or that long-awaited group hangout… or a job interview you prayed over for weeks. You board the plane, find your seat, whisper a quick prayer for smooth skies, and before you can say “cabin crew, please arm your doors”, two full-grown men are trading punches like it’s Saturday Night Rumble.
According to reports, Freedom Atsekpoyi (popularly known as Mr Jollof), Senior Special Assistant to the Delta State Governor on New Media, and Martins Otse (VeryDarkMan), the ever-controversial social media critic, turned United Nigeria Airlines Flight UN052 into an unsolicited action film. Boarding was at Asaba International Airport, route to Lagos… but the drama? That one had no known destination.
Now, here’s the interesting part: while these men were busy redefining in-flight entertainment, almost everyone else on the plane suddenly transformed into investigative journalists, because, of course, why intervene when you can record? Why calm the situation when you can shout “Angle! Shey my camera dey capture am?” from row 7B?
Thankfully, after the punches gained enough mileage, a few men stepped in, including popular comedian Julian Stanley (aka Funny Bone), who decided the sky had seen enough embarrassment for the day.
However, beneath the spectacle lies a question that should trouble us more than the scuffle itself: How better are we than the leaders we complain about? We keep chanting that the older generation should hand over power, that the youth are ready, capable, and disciplined, but if those who claim to represent the “new Nigeria” can’t govern their tempers, inside an aircraft, then what exactly are we promising the country?
Come to think of it, if this is leadership of the future, then maybe, just maybe, the problem isn’t only those at the top. Maybe the problem is that we, too, haven’t learned restraint, emotional intelligence, or even the basic understanding that an aircraft is not a wrestling ring.
Until we do, the sad question remains: Are we any better than the people we want to replace?